maybe all one can do is hope to end up with the right regrets. -arthur miller


Commerical Christmas

This time of year always brings with it an enormous glut of holiday-themed TV advertisments.

There's the annual Coca Cola celebration of all things cute and arctic-- this year featuring the "in" arctic animal, the baby penguin. Nothing like coke in old-timey bottles to make penguins and polar bears dance together in harmony. At least that's what my high school bio teacher used to say. Look, Coke is basically responsible for Santa Claus as we know him, and a big hearty Jewish thanks to them for that. But if there's some big Coke scheme to make polar bears the new emblem of the birth of Christ? They got another thing coming.

Seasonal car ads are the worst. Do people actually give their loved ones cars festooned with enormous red bows? The only place I've seen this happen (and I'm using "seen" very loosely here), is on Laguna Beach, which despite being THE REAL OC--we get the message MTV, really-- doesn't exactly represent reality as actual real people know it. I guess I'll believe it when I wake up one morning with a brand new BMW in my driveway with a 6 foot long bow on it.

This year Planter's Nuts joined the game with a little spot featuring Mr. Peanut as a tot. It starts with a wee peanut boy opening his gifts, which turn out to be a cane, top hat, and monacle. A monacle. I haven't seen a non-peanut wear a monacle...ever. Maybe Grover Clevelend or someone like that in a very old photograph. Not exactly every little boy's dream under the tree Christmas morning, is all I'm saying. But then there's a little pull back and we see it's Mr. Peanut watching the old clip with Santa, having a good chuckle. Kudos to Planters for coming out the most tolerable Christmas ad of 2005. I tip my Mr. Peanut-commemorative top hat to you.

PS. Dear Honda: This season is called the Holidays, not the Hondadays. So no more Hondaday carols, please. Thank you muchly.


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